A Lesson Learned..Hello 2014

Well 2014 arrived, and I was still trying to sort out the mess from 2013. I don’t think I’m the only one, I think lots of people want a fresh start as a New Year is welcomed in with alcohol and singing and most likely a stonker of a hangover, but they also find that bits of the messy thing we call life are carried into the New Year.

2013 was a really difficult year for me. It started with the collapse of a relationship, homelessness, no job, no money and a child that needed support as the rug was pulled from under us.

Gradually as the year progressed I started to rebuild a life. I got a good job, my son was happier and then as it always does the pull of my old life appeared. A very close friend of mine wisely said, don’t go back, leave the past in the past, keep moving forward. But you know how it is, the remnants of love, the want to be back and stable and happy in the home you thought you would be in for a very long time.

So I stepped back. Now this was not easy, there was hurt and distrust to overcome but you know what, if  you cover your ears and lalala instead of listen to your instinct then guess what? Yep thats right you just do it.

I cut myself off from the nay sayers, I decided if they couldn’t support me I would do this alone. I wanted to be 100% present and positive in my choice.

So the end of 2013 arrived. All the stress I had buried, all the worry I had ignored, all those voices from my instinct decided it was time to burst out. I started to get panic attacks, I felt sick, I cried all, and I mean ALL the time. The doctor offered counselling, I went to one session and decided I didn’t want to dig any deeper, I didn’t want to find what was buried in the true reality.

The end of 2013 was a big bad wake up call. All the worries and fears were realised, once again I was on the verge of losing my home, and I had no-one to blame. You see I ignored my instinct throughout 2013, I knew that something was up. I had avoided people I knew would support me but only after saying “we told you so”.

SO  the decision has been made, I am moving home to my parents. 46 years old and living at home, hhhmmm that wasn’t really in my life plan. But you know what was in my life plan, working for a company whose ideals I love, writing more and more and being surrounded by people I love and who care for me no matter what.

Life, The Universe, “God”…however you view it just had to wait for me to stop being so stubborn and turn up for my life, for me to take responsibility for the part I have played, to release the blame and anger for others parts in my poor choices, then and only then can I move forward and thrive.

SO HELLO 2014, I’m ready for my life now

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My Husbands Favourite – Leek and Potato Soup

So if you ask my husband what soup he loves the most with no hesitation he says “Leek and Potato”. He associates it with family get togethers and particularly Christmas and I have found it is a sure fire way to ensure a smile from him after he has had a long day at work. Plus there is always some left over for lunch the next day.

Leek and Potato Soup

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2 -3 medium leeks

3-4 medium potatotes

2 onions

1 ½ pint veg stock or chicken stock

2-3 oz non-dairy marg

 

Chop all the veg. Make the onions small like for a pasta sauce, cube the potatoes and slice the leeks finely.

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Melt non-dairy marg in a saucepan and sauté the veg until you get that gorgeous leeky/oniony aroma. Whilst the veg is sauting add freshly ground black pepper and some salt. I use a salt with seaweed and herbs for a bit of variety. Keep stirring and tossing the veg so it does not stick to the bottom of the pan.

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Add stock,  and stir thoroughly, leave to simmer. When the potatoes feel soft, like they would feel for mash, you can either use a potato masher and thicken or blend in the food processor.

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Domestic Goddesses Remember You Just Have to be Good Not Perfect

Cambridge Dictionary online Domestic Goddess  ” a woman who is very good at cooking and keeping her house clean and organized“. Well my house is clean when I am not working and slowly descends into chaos when I am at work. I can cook but I do tend to wear most of my ingredients on my t-shirts or dresses because I forget to put an apron on, so maybe I can be classified as one as it doesn’t say I have to be perfect just good at what I do and love.

When I watch those lovely household goddesses on t.v. or see them in the glossy magazines and they say how they would never buy stock as making it is far superior, and that they use whole not tinned tomatoes because who wants tinned food… WELL… I am here to tell you there is absolutely nothing wrong with using a tin of tomatoes or beans, frozen veg can save a tonne of cash if you find you run out of time before your veg has gone mouldy , and stock cubes are quick and easy and occasionally really tasty, so don’t feel bad if you are tired or time starved…remember you just have to be good not perfect.

But if like me a way to relax is cooking then here are a few tips and basic to help you make your own stock, or peel tomatoes or make the perfect rice

Vegetable Stock

Peel Tomatoes

Perfect Rice

Be sure to check back as this post will have more tips over the next few weeks